Seven.

A Walk Down Memory Lane..7

“Lama shftich ma3a Bader walla 7tarait! Lana faj2a taghayyar 3alay o kan wayed ys2alny 3anich o faj2a algach etitha7ikain ma3a 7ady tanarfazt! I thought he was the one for me, kint an6ira ytkharaj o eye yakh6ibny.. bs lama shftkum glt Monya kharebat kilshay,” Rawan said while crying, “7asait maby ashoofich maby asma3 minich shay! O sawait elly sawaita o ana a3tirif enha akbar ghal6a ghal6t’ha o ana asfa Monya walla asfaa!!”

She was sitting on the couch and I was standing next to the window just listening to her. I feel like I don’t know her anymore, like there’s a stranger in my house. She turned out exactly the opposite of everything I thought she was.

“Monya, adry 9a3ba enich tsam7eeny eb suhoola o elly sawaita feech mo shwaya, bs 7awlay ma3a el ayam enich tsam7eeny aw 3al aqal tkalmeeny bs,” she begged.

“Rawan madry shagolich el9ara7a, entay makhalaytay feeha shay!” I said while still looking at the window. “Elly sawaity shay magdar ansa.”

“Entay matadreen ana shkthr mit7asfa 3ally sawaita, walla lo yrid feeny eziman chan khalait Bader ewaly o masawait kil hal mashakil 3ashana bs ana ensan o elensan yaghli6---“

“La Rawan please latig3deen etgoleely el insan yaghli6 o madry shnu entay elly sawaiteeh mu ghal6a!! Rawan entay distay 3ala el3ishra o el9adaqa elly bainy o bainich 3ashan mnu?? Wa7id walla mayadry 3anha wadarich!!” I shouted.

Rawan covered her face with her hands and continued crying. I’m really not in the mood for this drama; I have enough in my own life already!!

“Rawan please magdar akalmich al7een!!” I said hoping she would leave.

“3ugub makhala9 el3rs 7sait eb qamta mo 6abe3eya, it just hit me, everything I did. Khathait wa7id ma7iba 3ashan a7irich bs mafakart shnu ra7 e9er 3ugub el3rs o mafakrt billy sawaita eb ahaly wanast’hum o fara7t’hum eb 3irsy o akher shay ra7 ninfi9il,” she said as she got up and walked over to me. “Bs Monya walla en9idamt minna bil sufar!! 3inda suwalif laih elras mo ma3qoola hatha Zaid elly kintay tkalmeeny 3anna!!”

“La wallaa o al7een yaya etibalain 3ala el rayal!! Entay taghl6een o tg6eenha eb rasa? Laykoon gltay 7ag ahalich enich ebtinfa9lain lana elrayel fee 3aib?” I shouted with my eyes wide. She just crossed the line, I mean WTH?

“Monya walla el3atheem eny mo ga3da atballa 3ala el rayal! Ana bs khayfa enna ygi9 3alaich eb kilmitain o b3dain etiwahigain ma3a! Monya 3ashany sheely min balich!” she said.

“I can’t believe you right now, Rawan please 6il3ay barra al7een walla magdar ashofich magdar!!” I shouted at the top of my lungs.

“Monyaa walla—

“AL7EEEN RAWAAN 6L3AAY BARRA!!!”

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“Kint aby athba7haa! 7arratny wallah 7aratny!! 3ugub kil elly sawita tgoly akhaf egi9 3alaich??” I was so irritated even from the memory.

“Enzain mashra7atlich shsalfita? Shnu shafat mina?” Dr. Manar asked.

“La ma3a6ait’ha majal a9lan!! Maly khilg asmaa3 chthoob zyada! Glt akeed ga9at 3ala ahalha eb hal chithba o bitgooly 3ashan a9adeg’ha o asame7ha!” I said.

“Eee 9a7! Etha el ensan kan fee 3aib o mayaby yftha7 3umra egi6 3yoba 3ala elnas,” she said.

“Bithaab6 hatha elly khft minna! Fa gilt badig 3ala Zaid o akalma o a3aref mina esalfa kilaha,” I said.

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“Aloo,” I said.

“Hala walla!” Zaid said.

“Hala feek, agoolik Zaid sh3ndik al7een?” I asked.

“Etha tabeny ayeelich afathy roo7y afa 3alaich,” he said.

“Haha la meta ma fethait kalimny,” I said.

“ana fathy al7een yalla ayelich??” he asked.

“La ro7 bait baba Khalid (our grandfather) lana mafe a7ad hnak o etha a7ad shafna ngol enna zayreen!” I said.

“Haha la3bat’ha 9a7!” he chuckled.

“Afa 3alaik, yala enshofik,” I said before I hung up.

My heart was beating so fast as I paced back and forth waiting for him to show up. It was like a dream and everything was happening so fast. I was really scared of what he has to say. I decided to stop over thinking until he finally came.

When he saw me he smiled, and when I saw his smile I felt like the world was spinning. I missed his handsome face. He walked over to me until we were inches apart.

“Hala Monya,” he said as he looked into my eyes.

“H-hala feek,” I whipered.

“Walla walaht 3alaich wayed!” he said.

“Tolah 3alaik el3afya,” I was so nervous.

“Shda3wa 9ayra rasmya wayed,” he chuckled.

“Hehe madryy.. Enzain gooly, shnu eshay elmuhim??" I said.

"Awal shay tefathelay," he pointed at the couch, and then he sat next to me.

"Shofay bagolich shay 3an Rawan, bs mu qa9dy afareg bainkum adry ena 3elaqatkum qaweya. Bs elly saweta e9ara7a 9edamny!" he said with a serious tone.

Good, he doesn’t know about the big fight between Rawan and I.

"Umm 3ady gool," I said with a smile.

"Shofay, awal maradaina min el3rs kanat mnafsa o 7asait'ha malha khlgy fa khalat'ha 3ala ra7at'ha, bs b3dain kila ehya ga3da broo7ha o mataby tsawy shay ma3ay yaninatny!! kanat ayam elkh6ba ghaiir o al7een ghaair!!" he said while playing with his hands.

You're not the only one she played, join the club.

"Ana glt ymkin khayfa wela shay o 7ata kanat 7ajzatlaha extra bed o khalatny ana anam 3alaih!! elmuhim marra kanat etisaba7 o mobilha yamy wila yo9al message o garait esmich. Madry laish khathait el mobile o garait el message o en9idamt!!" he stopped and looked at me, probably looking at my horrified expression.

I never talked to Rawan on her honeymoon, laykoon sawat elly eb baly. :o

"Legait el msgat bainich o bainha o enna ehya ga3da ttkalam chnha ana. La o el akbar min chthy ena ehya makhtha el sim card elkwty maly o 7a6ita eb mobilha etkalmich mina!! Ana min asafer ashtry sim card o akhaly mobily lkwty blsafe, mahagait btsawy chthy!"

My jaw was open so wide it almost reached the ground. I felt my throat dry up and my heart racing in my chest.

"Garait el msgat o shft shlon entay radaitay 3alaihaa o ga3adt afaker feeech o glt khal akamil 3ala elly saweta Rawan. Kint aby tit6awar 3elaqtna walla mo qasdy eny al3ab 3alaich ya3ny entay t3arfeny ma3ndy halsuwalif! Bs wallaah kil ma akalmich a7is enny a7ibichh zyada walla Monya madry shsawaitay feeny," he said with a warm smile.

He looked at me then furrowed his eyebrows.

"Shfeech tabcheen? Monya walla asif makan qasdy enny ajri7ich bily sawaita, bs walla magidart 7asait lazim akalmich o kil yom agol lazim agolaha el9ij bs magedart akhaf matrdeen 3alay o et3a9been. Glt akalmich face to face a7san 3ashan ntfaham."

I wiped my tears and got up slowly. Zaid quickly shot up and stood in front of me. He stretched out his hands and held mine.

"Monya tukfain goleely entay sh7assa fee!" he begged.

I lowered my head as the tears kept streaming down my face. He placed his hand under my chin and raised my head. He wiped my tears with his thumb and just stared into my eyes.

I took a step backward and lowered my head, “Zaid ana akalmik ba3dain lazim aroo7 al7een.”

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“Ya3ny tekhayilay elly t7beena faj2a eyelich egoolich enna y7ibich o ytrajach tsam7eena? Wagt’ha kint I was following my heart fa makint afaker 3adel o sama7ta!!” I tried to justify my actions. I felt so stupid and embarrassed while speaking with the therapist.

“Eee hatha 3aibna el banat manfaker b3golna etha en7a6aina eb nafs hal mawqif haha,” Dr. Manar said.

"Kint awal kila ad3y enna Allah yaktibny min n9eeba, o marat asti7y 3ala wayhy o a7awel enny mafaker feeh! O kha9atan lama yrid likuwait o ashofa blzwara galby y3awerny lama afaker enna ymkin ytzawaj wa7da ghairy. o kint a9aly bil lail o ad3y o ad3y... bs 3ugub elly sawita Rawan bidal la artha bil amr elwaqi3 I started acting out," I said.

"Shofay shloon elkheera, akeed Allah mu katba lich o wala 7ag Rawan 3ad shofay mnu el ma7thootha," she said with a smile. 

“Haha ee! O ham kint min9adma min 7arakat Rawan! Ya3ny shnu kan qa9d’ha enha tkalimny min kha6 Zaid shnu elly taby to9alla??” I said, “Kint aby asami7ha walla! Kint aby kil ely 9ar e3ady o ninsa o nrid mithl gabil bs kil yoom ta9dimnyy eb shay!!”

“3ad 9ara7teeha bilmawthoo3??” she asked.

“Wagt’ha makint aby ashofha a9laan lana wayed 6a7at min 3ainy mo shwaya!! O wayed tegarabt min Zaid o 9rna kila nsoolif ya3ny 3azalt 3umry min edinya o 9ar uhwa dinyity,” I said.

“O shlon kanat radat fi3il ahalich?” she asked.

I lowered my head as I remembered. I was tired of crying as I completed the puzzle of my past. I didn’t want to hide behind my pain and let it get the best of me. I realized I should talk about my past like it’s one of the many lessons of life, and not let it haunt me and keep me from pursuing my dreams.

ولا تجيني تعتذر ... وان كان ماعندك خبر وماتدري ايش صاير خذ مني الخبر القلب غض عنك النظر بالملم اوراقك وبنوي عالسفر عالبال طيفك ماخطر

ولا تجيني تعتذر **Hello beautiful readers;** I will deactivate my twitter account for real this time so if you have any questions or you can tell me what you think by commenting. Love youu xx